Why Cars > Kids

1. Cars are useful. Kids know nothing except to make you do things.
2. Cars are a set amount of money you have to pay, and you can choose what you’re willing to spend. Kids are a bottomless pit you throw money away into with no ending in sight.
3. Cars are beautiful. Kids are awkward, especially when they lose teeth and  in those preteen years.
4. Cars return the favor when you turn them on. Kids limit when you can have sex which is a huge turn off.
5. Cars let you go anywhere you can think of. Kids limit where you can go because you have to set up all kinds of other plans just to have a couple of hours to yourself.
6. Cars have a wonderfully tuned sound to their engine that is designed to be pleasing to the ear. Kids are loud and annoying by design.
7. If you don’t like the way your car looks when you’re looking for it, you can choose another one. You can’t choose what your child looks like without genetically altering it.